"Now, is it separate property, because he started it before we were married and all of the labor he did to build it was his? Or is it community property because he was able to build said company on the back of my unpaid labor at home?" Your entire article just enraged me. We wives are NEEDED, but not really seen as equal overall. So much historical, epigenetic, cultural misogyny. Makes me want to burn things down.
I’ve been very interested in creative women who have been erased as well. Seeking out books about long forgotten women. Of course, as you pointed out, this isn’t at all historical. I’ve been reflecting about silence and self-censorship lately. The types of it, the whys and hows. This post just gives me another layer to think through as I develop my thoughts.
I had to "school" a paralegal how *not* to erase me during a house purchase for me and my husband. I told them, politely, never again to write "Mr & Mrs (husband first & last name) on any documents relating to our purchase. Told them to write out both first names. I mean, I owned the home when we married 30+ yrs ago. I will NOT be erased.
This was a wonderful piece- I hope I can get to Wifedom soon (I escaped my own wifedom several years ago). I've also been wanting to read Francoise Gilot's Life With Picasso about her experiences with her 40-years-older lover.
This book is now on TBR list. I've read The Wife but this seems to go deeper in so many ways. Appreciated your take on it from your own experience of having a career subsumed by a man's needs and his expectations (or society's expectations of what we women should do).
Thank you for writing this. I felt so seen throughout. Especially about “It seems to be the work of this generation of mothers to build a new model for marriage and motherhood.” The work to communicate our need for change to our husbands, our children, and to all of society around us.
"Now, is it separate property, because he started it before we were married and all of the labor he did to build it was his? Or is it community property because he was able to build said company on the back of my unpaid labor at home?" Your entire article just enraged me. We wives are NEEDED, but not really seen as equal overall. So much historical, epigenetic, cultural misogyny. Makes me want to burn things down.
"Now, is it separate property, because he started it before we were married and all of the labor he did to build it was his? Or is it community property because he was able to build said company on the back of my unpaid labor at home?" Your entire article just enraged me. We wives are NEEDED, but not really seen as equal overall. So much historical, epigenetic, cultural misogyny. Makes me want to burn things down.
I’ve been very interested in creative women who have been erased as well. Seeking out books about long forgotten women. Of course, as you pointed out, this isn’t at all historical. I’ve been reflecting about silence and self-censorship lately. The types of it, the whys and hows. This post just gives me another layer to think through as I develop my thoughts.
I had to "school" a paralegal how *not* to erase me during a house purchase for me and my husband. I told them, politely, never again to write "Mr & Mrs (husband first & last name) on any documents relating to our purchase. Told them to write out both first names. I mean, I owned the home when we married 30+ yrs ago. I will NOT be erased.
This was a wonderful piece- I hope I can get to Wifedom soon (I escaped my own wifedom several years ago). I've also been wanting to read Francoise Gilot's Life With Picasso about her experiences with her 40-years-older lover.
This book is now on TBR list. I've read The Wife but this seems to go deeper in so many ways. Appreciated your take on it from your own experience of having a career subsumed by a man's needs and his expectations (or society's expectations of what we women should do).
Thank you for writing this. I felt so seen throughout. Especially about “It seems to be the work of this generation of mothers to build a new model for marriage and motherhood.” The work to communicate our need for change to our husbands, our children, and to all of society around us.
"Now, is it separate property, because he started it before we were married and all of the labor he did to build it was his? Or is it community property because he was able to build said company on the back of my unpaid labor at home?" Your entire article just enraged me. We wives are NEEDED, but not really seen as equal overall. So much historical, epigenetic, cultural misogyny. Makes me want to burn things down.