Cultural Cliff Notes: My Top 25 Episodes of "We Can Do Hard Things"
an ode to impactful conversations
As many of you know, I’ve been a Glennon Doyle fan for a very long time (read this post to discover my history with her). When the podcast “We Can Do Hard Things” debuted in early 2021, it felt like it was tailor made for me. Everything I was learning about myself in therapy or reading about in books would be discussed in that week’s episode. It was uncanny.
In each podcast Glennon sits down with her sister Amanda Doyle and her wife, Abby Wambach, to discuss issues in their own lives or interview an author or expert. I wish they had stuck to just one podcast per week because I do not have time to keep up with two episodes per week. But I would estimate that of the 255 episodes currently available, I have probably listened to 225.
Not every episode is life changing. I mean, they are all entertaining and illuminating. But others are have a certain kind of magic. The perfect mix of topic and guest, or just the right fusion in the room in that particular moment. Or sometimes the episodes just hit right when I needed their wisdom.
Below are my top 25 We Can Do Hard Things podcasts, in sequential order:
#4 Fun: What the hell is it and why do we need it?
There are a lot of similarities between Glennon and Amanda and me and my sister (one thing: codependency… they evidently shared a security blanket!). But for high achieving good girls, we do not learn to have fun. There is no time for it! And what is the point?!?! This episode hit home.
#6 Overwhelm: Is our exhaustion a sign that we’re CareTicking time bombs?
An episode about the mental load of motherhood at a time when people were just starting to name it. It asks whether self-abandonment is a job requirement of motherhood (it isn’t!). The episode all moms were sending to each other saying: Did you listen to this?
#8 Self-care: How do we identify our real needs and finally get them met?
I think many women struggle to identify our needs (I’ve really been wanting to read this book!). This podcast touches on resentment (I write about that here) and why refusing to be selfless is the best way to care for others and the world. This is where the pod began to signal that it was going to be something different. It was going to say the unspeakable things. It was going to start new conversations and rebel against the norms. This is when I realized that this podcast could really change the world.
#14 Silent Sex Queen: Why aren’t we talking about sex more?
This was the first of MANY episodes about sex and I am grateful for all of them but especially this one that opened the can of worms. They have gone on to have Emily Nagoski, Jen Gunter, Vanessa Marin, and many more experts. But this one is everything for me.
#20 Playing Our Roles: How does culture’s invention of gender typecast every last one of us?
It has been so wonderful to see the podcast unpack gender in multiple episodes. This was the very first but I am so grateful for them talking about these concepts.
#26 Sexual Desire: How do we know who and what we really want?
This was the first time I heard people really start to interrogate desire. I then went on to write a lot about it myself (here and here and here) but I feel like this podcast gave me permission to unpack some of these concepts.
#86 Jen Hatmaker: What We Win When We Lose It All
Jen’s honest reflections about the end of her marriage when she was raised in a religion that taught you to prize marriage above all else was just what I needed at this point in my life (when I still couldn’t admit the truth to myself that I no longer wanted to be married). She talks in this episode about the many knowings she had that something was wrong in her marriage before she could own it. I can very much relate.